Apparently the HR chick didn't know how to 'take it', if she asked me i would have probably have told her, 'You take it any way you can, baby'
Australia, where is your sense of humor?
So, failing that, i sent it to a 'select few', this is what i wrote...
I would like you to consider Stuart Moncrieff for a AMI Reward & Recognition, Steward is an AMI colleague of great Prestige in the Project for his work Performance and of course Performance testing, multi tasking it would appear, is his 'thing'?
When asking anyone (don't ask god!) what Stewart Moncrieff means to them? Well if they were a fan of anagrams, it would be 'SCUFF TERMINATOR', I suppose the 'terminator' bit could signify his prowess in the defect annihilation? Could 'scruff' somehow be in relation to how he irons his shirts?
To someone else, probably a Klingon? His name anagram could be 'art stew crie moniff',which might not mean anything, on this planet? But which might in fact be some sort of SOS message to a highly evolved species of beings from another galaxy, if it is Steward, I want out of this planet too?
So, in moving forward, I would like to discuss how Steward has contributed to the AMI roll out effort in relation to the following core values 'Safety, Passion, Integrity, Teamwork & Excellence'
Safety - When Steward is navigating the mean streets of Melbourne on a daily basis he wears a high visibility, blood spattered vest, since he has not incurred the force of an automobile and the blood is not his, I can only infer this 'strategy' of 'Staying alive' is working for him, do you think he's a fan of the 'Bee Gee's' too?
Passion - Steward, has been the one for me on this project to lead by example, a bit of a Chis Judd if you like (the Brownlow medal winner). Now, Chris Judd, in round 8 of the AFL league, Carlton were defeated by 56 points, but Chis Judd got 3 Brownlow votes for his effort on this day, a victory in defeat some might thing?
And today, Steward's got my vote!
And to add to this key quality, if you were to judge Steward's by his hair cuts and AMI project was terminated, Steward would not hesitate in shipping off to Iraq to fight for justice, democracy, truth, youth, beauty......and a picture of you? Maybe I’ve been listening to too much music from 'The Whitlam’s' there?
Integrity - Steward's attitude in the office is only inspirational to his colleagues, even though he's a huge fan of Dilbert, he would never consider for a second taking office supplies, or for example taking advantage of the free fruit supplied for our level, his apples are a different variety from everyone elses?
It could also signify, fruit supplies here isn't good enough for Steward? Which would beg the question, how his ancestors even came to be in Australia in the first place? (See 'art stew crie moniff' above)
Teamwork - Steward, it seems to me, is the kind of person that would not hesitate in 'Take one for the team', maybe he should have been a presidential body guard like that guy in the movie 'In the line of fire'? JFK could have done with a man like our Steward, but since he wasn't even born at the time of that eventful day in Dallas, so there's not much Steward could have done about that great injustice.
Excellence - You might not be aware of this, but Steward is rated 'Top 10 in the world' (maybe David Letterman should receive a copy of this mail?) at his chosen profession, I know this as he confessed this to me one day and in case if your thinking, it wasn't a Sunday, during confession and I'm not allowed to hear confession....anymore, but i digress.
In closing, I hope you will seriously consider Steward, and we can all raise our tea cups for his great efforts...so far.